I’ve rewritten this blog post three times, each with a very different tone. The first carried hope and optimism with a goofy attitude as I reflected on my early 20s. The second discussed the freedom and enlightenment of independence in young adulthood. The third rendition, the one you’re reading now, is one of persistence, visualization, and navigation through some of life’s obstacles.
I turned 26 this past November and I’m coming to terms with being on the backside of my 20s. My priorities shifted and long term planning has occupied much of my focus. Back in August 2022, I took on a serving job at night to pay off debt, save up for an engagement ring, and stack up cash for a down payment on a home. For the past six months, I’ve been putting in 16+ hour work days at least three times per week. During that time I’ve accomplished two of my goals but everything feels like an uphill battle.
The rising cost of living across rent, energy bills, food, and gas has really fucked with my purchasing power. Working two jobs doesn’t afford me the same lifestyle I enjoyed two years ago while only working my day job. I’ve been struggling to balance my relationship, working 65+ hours each week, being a great dog father, cooking, keeping up with chores around the house, jiu jitsu, weightlifting, snowboarding, being a good friend, reaching out to family, socializing, writing, being creative, financial planning, and pursuing personal development. I’m constantly at odds with letting bitterness creep into my psyche. While I’m inclined toward optimism, it hasn’t been easy to find joy when work consumes the majority of my freetime. There has been a deterioration in my creativity, spirituality, and connectedness with the world around me.
Dealing with stress in the past, I’d put up blinders and couldn’t see the answers to my problems. Now in my late 20s, I’m learning more about myself and how I deal with my own bullshit. I took an inventory of all the things I’m discontented with and wrote them down. Being able to read these obstacles aloud enabled me to determine how I can adjust my actions and behaviors to reach my desired outcomes. I treated these problems as if they belonged to someone else and wrote down the advice I’d give to this imaginary person. The solutions were clear and simple. Now I’m taking my own advice.
At 26, I’ve come to recognize how much I value time. Each moment is a window that can be optimized or wasted depending on how I engage with it. I’ve had to delete social media apps and chess games from my phone to take back my time and focus on things that help me achieve my goals. Watching others live a highly-processed version of their lives wasn’t benefiting me at all and it consumed too much of my precious time. I’m still working through my priorities and what matters to me most.
I continue to learn more about my strengths and weaknesses, my likes and dislikes, and my ability to navigate through life’s challenges. I know that calculated action and consistency create meaningful change. I know that I am responsible for 99.99999% of my outcomes. I value quality time with family and friends, indulging in life’s pleasures, new experiences, uninhibited freedom, overcoming hardship, learning about the world around me, and so much more. I’ve chosen to invest my time, energy, and focus into the things that empower me to pour as much of myself into these priorities as possible.
As I look around at my age cohort, some of my friends are skipping their 30s and going straight to golf, family life, that cushy corporate job, and a beer belly. Others aren’t capable of making their own decisions without input, or even worse, approval from their parents. I’m intent on setting my life up the way I want, free to do as I please. This period in my life appears to be pivotal and a sense of urgency is in the air.
As each day passes, I’m motivated by the fear of waking up on the backside of my 30s with nothing to show for all the effort in my 20s. Although my schedule is rigid at the present moment, I know that goal setting and structure are keeping me on the path to the personal freedom that I visualize.
Though this period is a grind littered with frustration, the peaks and valleys of individual autonomy are what makes life beautiful. I am free to do as I please so long as I accept the consequences of my choices. If life was only easy, it would be boring. If life was only hard, it would be bleak. I am grateful for the difficulties I’ve invited into my life and I carry on with hope that things will continually get better.
To my future self, you’re welcome. To my present self, do better. To my past self, thank you.
This shit is temporary so get the most out of it.
Until next time,
Mike
Read my mind. 